Training your own daughter

A forum for coaches to discuss coaching technique and advice with each other. Only registered coaches can post in this forum.

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Joined: Sun Mar 13, 2005 2:59 pm
Expertise: Former HS Vaulter, Former College Vaulter, USAT&F Official, PIAA Official
Lifetime Best: 14'
Favorite Vaulter: Brian Sternberg
Location: Springfield, PA

Own Kids

Unread postby drcurran » Tue Nov 28, 2006 8:25 pm

I was lucky enough to coach both my daughters and both my sons in the pole vault (XC also). It was a great experience. We had an understanding that Coach was Coach and Dad was Dad. Never really had any "issues" (at least nothing I can remember) maybe they will remember some. Would not have traded the experience for anything. Just keep it fun!

I'm not as good as I once was, but I'm as good once as I ever was!

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Unread postby htheodore » Tue Nov 28, 2006 11:26 pm

It has gotten better since my original post. It seem the intrest is coming back the closer we get to the season. It has been a great time coaching my own kids, especially after coaching other vaulters for 22 yrs. I think keeping it fun is the key. Also knowing when enough is enough and a break is needed.

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Location: Placentia Ca

Its been great

Unread postby fchipr » Mon Dec 18, 2006 3:17 pm

I've done it for the last three years (9,10 and 11th grade) and up until girlfriends and cars this last summer its been absolutely good for us both and he would say the same. This year has been just a matter of adjusting to his changing full schedule in life. But still its good.

In fact there is alot to be said for the value of long term continuity and the resulting trust required to perform at their best when its all on the line. A PV coach and high caliber athelete requires a special relationship or you never get to "high caliber".

My son and I are closer for it, and the sacrifices I have had to make in earnings and career have been worth it.

Let me share a particular moment.

Nothing like the trust that must exisit when being at the a big post season prelims meet, when your son starts after all others have and the qualifying number of atheletes just awaits his make or miss of the height to see which 9 move on. The height is 14'0 a decent ht for a 11th grader, but a vault he has started at at many big invites during the year and has been fine with, and its a foot below his PR.

He's blowing through the pole on vault number two after missing on vault 1 because his step was out a foot (he was slow cause long sit time and no warm up vault). Hes got plenty of height but its now all of a sudden, do or die, vault number 3 time. And everything is on the line. He's calm but you can tell he knows the unbelievable disappointment that maybe just 1 vault away as he forces himself to dwell on the positive expectations he needs. because he also knows that any of a bunch silly reasons could screw things up (anything can happen its the pole vault).

He can't think of adjusting anything this time, he just looks ya in the eye and says, Well Dad what do I do? He wants no part of "owning" the answer. He wants the answer to be reassuring and truely confident coming from you, because he trusts you like no other.. After deciding between the options and risks to your self, You give him the answer and remind him "it only takes one"

Third vault MAKE.

A baby tear in his eye starts to sneak out as he falls from above and behind the crossbar cause he taps the crossbar on the way up and watches it slide an inch towards him on the three inch pin and start to wiggle a bit as he skys over. It stays up. The baby tear goes away 2 seconds after he hits the pits. He moves on. Competion over. Prelims over.

Its all good!!!!

Thats why ya coach your kid!

A few misc tips we've used.

We've integrated a bit of side excursions with a smart guy or so to coach us thru some plateaus, but, thats not a changing coaches thing. Thats about the coach and kid being on the same page (in terms of technical understanding on the vault and kids strentghs and weaknesses and agreeing on the high payoff areas to work on) and its about being mature enough to say "lets get a different view" and either learn a technique thing we were perhaps overlooking or under-valueing, a new technical/drill thing to allieviate it or bring more consistancy so we could depend on it at meet time or hear a different way to verbally communicate something.

Be smart enough to know when you should be looking for, and asking one of the "real (not fake) smart" guys out there. Now thats a trick in itself too, since every PV coach out there knows everything. Chuckle.
Since just because some guy has vaulted 17 or 18 feet doesn't mean he can translate/coach anything.

Einstein was a "real" smart guy, but I'd never would be able to understand him trying to teach me anything about "relativity" he'd be a worthless coach for me.

BOTTOM LINE (and sorry for the rambling, but its been a big deal for me)

.... since not only for all the good things that came from being close to your kid, but it was magnified at the end of his year two. Right be for post season (end of April 2005 season), I was diagnosed , with a brain tumor and was given undefined understanding of the situation by the nuerologists, and surgery not sceduled until july. They didn't know what kind or much at all other than its in ok location and goota come out.

News like that will get ya focussed in a hurry to the important things in life !!! And coaching with him was one of my "important things in life"

Oh, surgery went well, I passed my 1 year check up this fall and don't need another pic of my head for 5 more years. God has blessed us both,.

SO: I vote yes,Coach your kid. Don't judge the kid.Give him/her all the slack they want so they can prove they are growing into adults as you. Become peers teamed together to help them, learn about dedication, goals, leadership, sportsmanship and building, adjusting real time and executing the plans to meet their goals. Every decision made is "owned by him" and discussed by you both who each bring value to the table.

Make sure the vault goals are the kids and not yours and use the time to share and watch him/her grow in self esteem and happiness, while staying out of trouble during these few choice years we get as parents.


Hope this helps ya

Coach Chip

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Unread postby htheodore » Mon Dec 18, 2006 11:56 pm

Very good Chip.

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